like a bed of rest

Last night, as you can see, I posted the 'Satisfied In You' video by The Sing Team from Mars Hill Church. I've been listening to it on repeat since then, and just thinking over the lyrics and making it a prayer from my own heart. I know it's the truth -- I will always be dissatisfied with everything in life -- my job, my situation, my clothes, my house, my spouse, my friends, and especially myself, my image, my body, my haircolour, my eyes, the way my jeans fit. Such petty things. And it's so easy to wonder, if I just change *this* or *that*, dye my hair brown, cut it, see new places, get a new job, a new apartment, be anyone else but myself, maybe then I'll be happy? If I just follow my dream career path, maybe then I'll feel fulfilled...? It's so easy to think in a way opposite to what is THE beneficial and truthful and soul-fulfilling way to think. When the world is fast, and everyone in it is simply looking to survive, to feel, to cope, to be 'happy', to eat, to drink, to breathe, just for today, when everything I do is .. for what? There is only One Place. We're all looking, searching and digging. We keep hoping, circling our fears, and living out of them. Really, we're all poor and powerless. What about trying? Tasting and seeing? That maybe, the Lord really is who He says He is. Not saying it, and living as if He isn't. Living as if He's a liar. That His promise to fill my empty cup, to be a shelter in the storm, to be a God of mercy, to be a God of salvation and of freedom, justice, truth... That's it's not true... The opposite of faith, I believe, is fear. And fear says that my God is NOT who He says He is. That He will NOT keep His promises -- And saying that is really declaring that He is a liar. Saying that God is a liar is taking His Word, His very breath, The Bible, and throwing it ,in it's entirety, in the trash. All of it. That sounds like near Atheism to me... A·the·ism  - noun - the doctrine or belief that there is no God. I shiver. I am tired of being fearful. And I repent of that sin-stress that sticks to my gut and my ribs and won't leave me alone. I let go of it. And, come what may, The LORD is my shepherd, and I want for nothing. He has the wheel. I give up. I give in. He is the One Place. The Source of all things good. All things worth anything. He is the only place I am satisfied. The only way my thirst is quenched. I am satisifed in Him. ( I just wanted to post the lyrics to that song, because they are true, and they are beautiful.) SATISFIED IN YOU I have lost my appetite And a flood is welling up behind my eyes So I eat the tears I cry And if that were not enough They know just the words to cut and tear and prod When they ask me “Whereʼs your God?” Why are you downcast, oh my soul? Why so disturbed within me? I can remember when you showed your face to me As a deer pants for water, so my soul thirsts for you And when I survey Your splendor, You so faithfully renew Like a bed of rest for my fainting flesh When Iʼm looking at the ground Itʼs an inbred feedback loop that drags me down So itʼs time to lift my brow And remember better days When I loved to worship you and learn your ways Singing sweetest songs of praise Let my sighs give way to songs that sing about your faithfulness Let my pain reveal your glory as my only real rest Let my losses show me all I truly have is you So when Iʼm drowning out at sea And all your breakers and your waves crash down on me Iʼll recall your safety scheme Youʼre the one who made the waves And your Son went out to suffer in my place And to show me that Iʼm safe Why am I down? Why so disturbed? I am satisfied in you creditsfrom Oh! Great Is Our God!, track released 03 April 2012 Written by Brian Eichelberger / E on the Eye Chart (BMI) x